By Aine Belton
One mistake many people make when they first hear about the Law of Attraction (i.e. that their thoughts and feelings create their reality), is to start judging, repressing, or denying negative feelings out of a fear of the negative consequences they may attract.
‘Bad’ feelings are not ‘wrong’. Furthermore, what we resist persists. Pretending you don’t have feelings or numbing them out doesn’t make them go away.
Negative emotions can be helpful guides to what’s going on inside – the limiting thoughts, beliefs and stories that may not be serving you and standing in the way of the dreams you wish to manifest.
Painful or uncomfortable feelings can illuminate un-serving thoughts and attitudes, unhealed aspects within, and hidden agendas.
Many termed ‘negative’ emotions can also serve a positive function. Grieving, for example, is a natural process that may involve the experience of pain yet ultimately lead to healing. Fear’s function is to signal when to protect yourself from potential harm. Even anger if acknowledged and expressed cleanly can at times be productive – a catalyst for change, awareness of what you don’t want, or assertion of respect, for example.
Feelings are a natural part of the human experience. It is when feelings are repressed that they become problematic, toxic, and leak into your world affecting your reality in not so pleasant ways. They may come out ‘sideways’ as projection, passive-aggression, or sabotage, for example.
This is why honoring, accepting and letting your emotions be felt is important, and part of developing an intimate loving relationship with yourself. By this I don’t mean wallowing in them inappropriately, however, as I will explain (i.e. nip that self-pity in the bud!).
Emotions are supposed to MOVE (e-motion). When they are controlled, stifled and stuffed down, they can putrefy or stagnate, and like layers of dense energy can block light and the higher frequency energies of your true nature – the bright positive feelings of your essential self – the love, happiness and joy that you ARE!
Repressed emotions inhibit vitality, authenticity, spontaneity and flow. They can lead to depression, addictions, mental and emotional imbalance and ill health. When you accept and honour your feelings, rather than fear, judge, or deny them, they can more naturally be expressed, released and move through you.
What you accept, you more easily let go of and release.
“Acceptance heals hurt. It heals the resistance that causes or exacerbates the pain. When you accept, it allows you to move forward in the flow, because what you accept, you naturally let go of.”
~ Chuck Spezzano
Let your emotions breathe, whether that be to laugh, or be to grieve.”
With traumatic painful life experiences, there may at times be a level of safety in repressing emotions as a means to survive an experience and not be overwhelmed by terror/pain/despair/horror, for example.
In some cases feeling all your feelings at once may not be appropriate or in your best interest, and for this reason they may be stored in your unconscious until times when you are better equipped to deal with and process them. It is at these times that they may be triggered by an external person or event to be released, which can be seen as an opportunity for the wound or pattern beneath to be healed.
Placing a lid on emotions, whilst understandable if they are painful, is in general not serving, however, and can simultaneously block out the positive feelings that make life so worthwhile.
When you shut down to avoid painful feelings, you shut out the light feelings too! Give yourself permission to feel.”
There are many techniques these days for releasing emotions, everything from writing them down, the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), the Sedona Method, the Release Technique, the ZPoint Process, NLP, acupuncture, expressing them through creativity, energy healing (such as Reiki), communicating them to a friend or loved one, flower essences, and many others.
Unsurprisingly, and yet so often avoided, feeling your feelings is a fast and effective way to release them.
I share a step-by-step Releasing Emotions process to help with this in Part 2 of this series shortly.
This doesn’t mean indulging in them or giving them undue attention if they do not serve you. More, it enables them to move through you and be expressed. It takes greater energy to stuff emotions down than to experience them. Furthermore, denied and repressed emotions don’t go away, and can require numbing and distraction (through drugs, alcohol and addictions, for example).
Acknowledging, accepting and feeling an emotion will enable its release. Forgiveness, of self and others, can also liberate whole clusters of negative emotions.
Experiencing your emotions can at times feel like you’re walking into a fire – consider it a fire of purification and one that will set you free.
It may seem to get dark, and feelings more challenging initially, yet there will always be a clearing and breakthrough to light at the end of the tunnel.
The darkest hour is just before the dawn.” ~Proverb
As you release denser energies and emotions, space is created for brighter energies to flow through you and be received – more of the love, light, and joy that you are.
It is sometimes through the dark that you find and connect to the love and light within and the eternal truth that you are loved, loving and loveable, ever and always.
The deepest truth, I believe, is that only love is real.
I will be covering a Releasing Emotions process, as well as how to harness emotions for manifesting success in the next part of this series.
Love and blessings,